Tip #1 for Couples : Aim for Zero Negativity in your Shared Space

ZERO negativity towards the person you’re living with around the clock?

It sounds impossible, maybe even a little fake.

Try it – the results will surprise you.

During these intense days at home with your partner, you both deserve to express emotions openly, communicate your needs and receive listening, empathy and warmth in return.

You want to feel assured that you are in this together and that this crisis will not break your relationship.

Your connection with your partner exists in the ‘space’ you share.

As a couple, you are both responsible for keeping your space supportive, clean and safe.

When you consistently communicate with your partner in negative ways, the space becomes messy and dangerous and over time you may disconnect emotionally as a couple.

Here are a few common negatives that pollute your shared space:

• using words that hurt – judgement, blame and criticism (even the ‘constructive’ type)
• using a tone that hurts – sarcasm, arrogance or cynicism
• responding to criticism with criticism – defensiveness
• disappearing emotionally or physically – withdrawing, detaching or ignoring

A space filled with negative comments or behaviors make it impossible to share and to hear each other’s real message or to feel each other’s pain.

Take a step back and consider: what negatives do you bring into your shared space?

Notice when and how often you bring that particular negative.

Try to reduce it each day.

Aim for ZERO negativity so that your positive connection can thrive.

For more help through these challenging days, read my blog 7 Tips for Working at Home with your Partner and Keeping your Relationship Close and Strong