Why is conflict an opportunity for growth in a relationship?
It’s an opportunity to share different sides of yourself with your partner.
It’s an opportunity to get to know and appreciate your partner’s perspective and priorities.
It’s not always pleasant in the moment, but it’s real.
Constructive conflict can be empowering and authentic, and can ultimately create better listening and greater intimacy in your relationship.
I’m not just talking about shouting at each other over the daily routine.
I’m talking about expressing your frustrations, and openly acknowledging and making space for differences or disagreements.
If you hold back from identifying and bringing up what’s bothering you, it can lead to distance and deeper resentment down the line.
Over the last year, were you stressed, frustrated, and overwhelmed?
And as a couple, have you avoided conflict?
With so much going on in the world, maybe you wanted to ‘keep it together’ at home, or to present a united front to the kids.
Or maybe you were too exhausted to open up conflict, and it felt easier to smooth things over.
As one of your first steps back to routine, consider welcoming constructive conflict in your relationship.
What would that look like? And how would it feel to work through conflict together?
One important suggestion is to avoid insult, sarcasm, and blame when you’re entering into a conversation about differences or frustrations.
Try introducing your underlying resentment with a benefit of the doubt or with a compliment, showing your partner that you value them. For example, I appreciate that work is stressful for you, when you come home, it feels like you’re bringing all that stress and anxiety into our family, and that’s really hard for me.
When you work through a conflict together, you create potential for more intimacy and connection.
It’s not easy to do this on your own.
In relationship coaching, you’ll gain a framework and tools – along with my guidance and support – to help you communicate frustrations, make requests of one another, feel seen and valued, and reconnect to the love that brought you together.